Nobody Real in the Credits

Nobody Real in the Credits

Produce ONE image, 2:3 portrait: a cinema-style poster. Follow every line. Replace only the FIELDS block; everything after it is fixed.

First — do you have the fields?

If any field below still has braces around it, stop and ask. Put all the questions in one short message, and show the example under each one so they can see the shape of a useful answer. Wait for the replies, then draw. Never fill a brace yourself: a value you invented is a value nobody asked for, and it will look exactly as considered as the ones they did give you.

Ask in whatever language they are writing to you in. Translate the questions and the examples; do not make someone read English to tell you what they want.

The examples are only examples. If someone answers a question, use their answer; never fall back to the example because you prefer it.

If the fields are already filled in, ignore this and carry on.

Fields — replace these six lines only

• What it is about: {the subject}
• The title, and the slogan across it: {a title, and a handwritten phrase}
• The three credits — all invented: {three, each a role and a name}
• The quote: {one line, in quotation marks}
• The lower band: {a short line, a vertical word, a handwritten line, an inset object}
• The palette and the grain: {two colours, an accent, and the film stock}

The invention law

A film poster is a document about a real production. Everything on it — the studio mark, the credits, the certificate, the laurels — is a claim that something exists and that named parties made it. Which is why everything on this poster is invented.

• No real organisation, agency, programme, vessel, team or institution is named or depicted.
• No real insignia: no patch on a sleeve, no badge on a cap, no name or registration on a hull, no livery, no uniform belonging to a real body.
• No studio logo, distributor mark, rating certificate or release banner, invented or otherwise.

A reference run of this style was given the name of an actual polar research vessel. It returned a figure wearing that programme's real shoulder patch, complete with its emblem, and the ship rendered with its real name and operator on the hull. Anybody generating this on a real institution would produce something that looks like that institution's own campaign material. If your subject is a real thing, give the poster a fictional stand-in and keep the feeling.

The laurel law

Laurels here are separators. They are never awards.

In this idiom a wreath means a festival prize. So: no festival name inside or beside a laurel, no *official selection*, no year, no award wording, no star ratings, no critic quotes attributed to a publication. A laurel may sit between two credit columns as an ornament and nothing more.

The billing block

Set it the way the convention actually works, because that is what sells the whole thing:

• Three columns, evenly spaced, centred under the title.
• Each column: the role on the first line, the name on the second, both in very small, wide-tracked capitals.
• A laurel between the columns, small and symmetrical.
• Nothing bold, nothing coloured. The block's authority comes from being tiny and precise.

Credit things rather than people — a tide, a description, a season, a machine. It is funnier, and it is why nothing here needs a real name.

The layout

• Upper three quarters: the hero image, shallow focus, subject sharp against a soft background, with one or two light atmospheric elements — flecks, bokeh, drifting particles.
• A small line at the very top: a year and a short name, centred, tiny.
• The title beneath it, the largest thing on the page, in a serif display face, with the handwritten slogan laid across its middle in the accent colour.
• The billing block under the title.
• The quote small, in serif, in quotation marks, at one side.
• Lower quarter: a textured solid band. Short line upper left, the vertical word running up the right edge in tracked capitals, a large handwritten line across the foot, and one small realistic inset object at the right, about a quarter of the band's width.
• A torn or rough edge where the image meets the band.

Colour and finish

Two main colours and one saturated accent used only on the slogan and one or two small marks. Fine film grain over the whole image, gentle vignetting, nothing crushed or heavily graded.

Never

• ✕ any real organisation, vessel, programme or agency named or shown
• ✕ any real patch, badge, hull name, livery or uniform
• ✕ a studio mark, rating certificate or distributor banner
• ✕ a laurel carrying a festival name, award wording or a year
• ✕ critic quotes or star ratings attributed to anyone
• ✕ a billing block set large, bold or in colour

The result

A poster with all the ceremony of a release and none of its claims: one hero image, three credits that name nothing that exists, laurels that promise nothing, and a lower band that finishes it like a real sheet from a real cinema.